‘She was brilliant, funny, cultured and wise’

Bethenny Frankel announced that her mother Bernadette Birk died Friday at the age of 73 following a battle with lung cancer.

The reality TV personality, 53, shared the heartbreaking news on Saturday in an Instagram post with photos of her mother and a lengthy caption about their “complex” but loving relationship.

She touched on their difficult past and past estrangement in her post, but said they still cared deeply for each other and reconciled almost a decade ago after 12 years of dating. estrangement because of his teenage daughter Bryn, 13.

Frankel shared that her mother “loved” being Bryn’s grandmother and left her worldly possessions to her beloved granddaughter.

In her caption, the Real Housewives of New York City alum — who spoke candidly about her “traumatic” divorce from ex-husband Jason Hoppy on her Just B podcast over a week ago — shared that her mother “was suffering,” but she “had a sixth sense” at the time of her death and knew that her mother was finally “free and at peace.”

She wrote that her mother was “complex, suffering, isolated and had demons.”

Suggesting that they had improved their relationship, Frankel also said that she was the only person his mother wanted to be notified as next of kin.

In her post, the entrepreneur shared photos of her mother dancing with her during what appeared to be her secret wedding to first husband Peter Sussman in 1996.

In her carousel post, she shared a photo of her mother, perhaps around 20 years old when she gave birth to Frankel.

She also shared a photo of herself as a baby in her mother’s arms as they joined their family for a festive Christmas.

She also posted a photo of her mother in a wedding dress and her childhood standing next to her and the bridesmaids at Birk’s wedding to her second husband John Parisella, now 79, in 1975.

In another photo from several years later, a teenage Frankel could be seen clinking empty wine glasses with Birk as they enjoyed a mother-daughter dinner.

She also shared a photo of them together wearing a tropical vacation outfit when Frankel was a young adult.

The last photo in her slideshow included a more recent photo of her mother sharing a big hug with her daughter Bryn.

“My mother died of lung cancer,” she began before opening up about their difficult past and her mother’s struggles, which resulted in years of estrangement but ultimately reconciliation.

“She was complex, suffering, isolated and had demons. She was the most amazing woman you’ve ever seen, who left her abusive home as quickly as I left mine,” she continued.

Frankel wrote that despite her mother’s personal struggles, which affected her childhood, she still had and will remember “beautiful memories of her”.

“She was bright, funny, cultured and wise – but she suffered throughout her life from eating disorders, alcoholism, abuse, smoking and self-destruction. Even though she wasn’t equipped to be a mother, she loved me and I have fond memories of her.

“She taught me about food, spirit, culture and strength,” she wrote before adding that her mother “loved to dance.”

But also because of her mother, Frankel admitted that she had to grow up very young, which taught her strength and resilience.

“I’m not going to sugarcoat it. I was an adult long before Bryn’s age, experiencing things no young child should endure,” she wrote. “It made me a strong, resilient person, a survivor capable of anything manage. The universe gave me the most beautiful girl and my childhood gave me the inspiration to break the chain.

Next, Frankel wrote about reconciling with her mother nearly a decade ago after 12 years of estrangement because of her daughter Bryn, who was six years old at the time.

She previously said Birk had “never been a mother” to her and that she “never had a real childhood.”

In her Instagram post, however, she talked about her mother’s adoration for Bryn and how she was a loving grandmother to her.

“We reconnected so my daughter could know and love her,” she wrote. “She adored Bryn and they shared a love of art. She had a friend, so my lifelong wish came true: she wasn’t alone. She was selfish in life, but selfless in death. She left what little she had to my daughter, wanted to be cremated and didn’t want anyone but me to know.

As they improved their relationship and rebuilt their bond, Frankel said she felt it when her mother left the world.

“I had a sixth sense that she had surpassed. I had begun to release myself from trauma, dancing to the song I’m Alive in her favorite designer Alaia dress while she was dying.

“I remember her as a young woman during times of happiness who loved me and I long for those memories of affection,” she added. “I mourn his loss, his life, his loneliness and my childhood. I mourn her inability to experience motherhood, the greatest gift of life.

Addressing his mother, Frankel wrote: “Goodbye Mom, Bonnie, Bernadette. You have done your best and you are free and at peace.

She then shared her gratitude that her daughter inspired and encouraged them to reconcile so Bryn could meet her grandmother.

“I miss my mom when I was a little girl and I am grateful for my daughter who constantly strives to meet with her and me to reopen old wounds in their relationship.

“I think of you on this journey of releasing your trauma and holding you in my arms. Life is about loss and love. I was ashamed that I never really had a family, yet my very small group of friends, my beautiful Bryn and you are my family.

She also encouraged her fans to reach out to anyone they have a “complicated” relationship with and reconcile.

“Please call, connect, or hug someone you have a complicated relationship with today,” she wrote.

Previously, Frankel recalled being raised by her stepfather John Parisella, now 79, when she was just five years old.

Birk and her first husband, Frankel’s biological father Robert J. Frankel – who died at age 68 in November 2009 – were married for a brief period before he left and she later married Parisella, his friend and training competitor from horses.

Birk and Parisella later divorced when Frankel was just a teenager.

Birk is survived by his only daughter Bethenny Frankel and his granddaughter Bryn Hoppy.