The internet is defending a woman who insisted her husband pay for makeup he threw away.
Posted on Reddit’s “AmITheA**hole” forum, a woman with the username u/throw65687 posted her story for the community to decide if she was wrong. The post has 7,000 upvotes and 1,000 comments.
For starters, the Reddit user opened up about how she’s struggled with skin issues throughout her life and was finally able to wear makeup. Her husband “consents” to her wearing eyeshadow. However, he doesn’t like her using “wild” colors like blue, purple, red, and other light colors.
“He told me to tone it down because some of these eye shadows give a bad impression to strangers, in other words, I’d look like a h00*er wearing them. I took his opinion considered, but he still wasn’t happy.” she wrote.
When she noticed that her husband had thrown away all his eyeshadow palettes, she snapped at him why he would do that. Her reasoning was that she was using “inappropriate” colors when going to see her parents. He explained to her that he had given her a “warning” about wearing bright colors and that he shouldn’t be surprised.
The woman continued, “He said it wasn’t my fault I rejected him and I refused to listen when he said I looked like a clown and embarrassed him. Now , that offended me so much. I refused to talk to him after that.”
He complained to her that she was making a big fuss about him throwing her things away and that she would have to wear “colorless” eye shadow.
Advice columnist Jenée Desmond-Harris, writing for Slate The “Dear Prudence” column said of another example of a husband throwing away his wife’s belongings, “It borders on theft, and I worry what such a habit says about his respect for you. and your preferences.”
The “AmITheA**hole” community was quick to defend the Reddit user.
“[Not the A**hole]. It’s more than just eyeshadow. 1. He shouldn’t ‘consent’ to you wearing makeup or not. It’s your body and your face. 2. He demanded that you do what he wanted. When you refused to listen, he threw YOUR stuff away and said you shouldn’t be surprised because he “warned” you. Who is he to warn you of anything? He’s your husband, not your lord and master,” u/Arbor_Arabicae received the top comment with over 15,000 upvotes.
“3. Now he’s downplaying his behavior. He has no right to try and dictate what you should look like. If he tried that on a co-worker, he’d be arrested or, at least, that would be cause for be written Why is it okay for him to do this to you, someone he supposedly loves? It’s not going to get better, OP. He thinks he has the right to control you and will continue to do it now,” they continued.
U/yaneverknow19 wrote: “[Not the A**hole]. These are also huge red flags. Get out now. It shouldn’t tell you what you can and can’t wear, whether it’s clothes or makeup. It’s just control and he should definitely pay you back.”
“[Not the A**hole]. You’re 30, you’re not his daughter, or you need his permission. Besides being incredibly rude to throw YOUR OWN PROPERTY away, it is also abusive and controlling behavior. He should definitely pay to replace it and not touch it,” u/WholeAd2742 exclaimed.
Newsweek contacted u/throw65687 for comment.