Colbert: The Capitol Police and my staff were “just doing their job”


On Monday’s broadcast of CBS’ “The Late Show,” host Stephen Colbert discussed the arrests of some of his employees by Capitol Police and said “Capitol Police were just doing their job. My staff were just doing their jobs. And that the conduct of their staff “was puppet in the first degree. It was hijinks with intent to goof, the hijacking of an old piece of Conan” and “just a puppet.” doing puppet stuff. But “so much has changed in Washington that Capitol police need to remain on high alert at all times because of the Jan. 6 attack. And as the hearings prove more clearly every day , the responsibility for this real insurrection lies entirely with puppets.”

Colbert said: “Last week I heard about my former colleague Triumph the Insult Comic Dog. Triumph offered to travel to DC and interview members of Congress to highlight the January 6 hearings. I said, sure, if you can get someone to agree to talk to you. … Well, he did. Both Democratic and Republican congressmen agreed to speak to Triumph. … Now Triumph and my friends have been shooting for two days in the congressional offices across from the Capitol. They went through security clearance, were shot all day Wednesday, all day Thursday, invited into the offices of members of Congress they were interrogating. … Now, at the end of the second day, Thursday night, after finishing their interviews, they were doing some last-minute puppetry and wacky make-up in a hallway, when Triumph and my parents were approached and detained by Capitol Police. What’s actually not so surprising, the Capitol Police are much more cautious than they were, say, 18 months ago, and for very good reason. If you don’t know what that reason is, I know what news channel you are watching. So the Capitol Police were just doing their job. My staff was just doing their job. Everyone was very professional. Everyone was very calm. My collaborators were detained, treated and released. A very unpleasant experience for my staff, lots of paperwork for the Capitol Police, but a fairly simple story.

He continued, “Until the next night when a few people on TV started claiming that my puppet team had ‘committed an insurrection’ in the United States Capitol. First, what? Second, huh? Third, they weren’t in the capitol building. Fourth – and I’m shocked to have to explain the difference – but an insurrection is the disruption of the lawful actions of Congress and screaming for the blood of elected leaders, all to prevent the peaceful transfer of power. It was puppetry in the first degree. It was hijinks with goof intent, the hijacking of an old Conan tune. … Now it’s predictable that these TV speakers talk like that on TV. They want to talk about something other than the January 6 hearings on the real seditionist insurrection that resulted in the death of several people and the injury of more than 140 police officers. But to equate rioters storming our Capitol to prevent the counting of ballots with a stuffed dog biting cigars is a shameful and grotesque insult to the memory of all those who died and it obscenely trivializes the service and courage shown by the Capitol Police. on this dreadful day.

Colbert concludes:[I]In this case, our puppet was just a puppet doing puppet stuff. And, sad to say, so much has changed in Washington that Capitol police must remain on high alert at all times because of the Jan. 6 attack. And as the hearings prove more clearly every day, the blame for this real insurrection all lies with Putin’s puppet.

Follow Ian Hanchett on Twitter @IanHanchett




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